so strange
that
being a loner
is a part of who I am
just as much as being
a needy person.

i think
a
shift
of sorts is happening.

I come out of myself, kicking and screaming, showing people things in my head. Trying to be understood. Accepted. et cetera!

Trying to share how it feels to experience certain things.

For various reasons -both my own and otherwise- I feel like its not working.
so. I need to improve my own understanding of this mind exploding cosmic thing im aware of dimly. I need some time to muse. Some isolation. reduction of distractions. I think thats one reason I removed the video games from my PC. Im going to get a better sense of myself, and hope