in my head I have this idea of the perfect Sanctum

freedom from distraction

we'll see how it goes.

Ive got a big big dream to live up to. Im excited to give it a really good try.

Just focusing on beauty I hear and see, and trying to do something creatively with it. Paint and words and music, and love, and holding, and reading, and meaning. nothing else. no stupid jokes, no video games or distractions. and in a selfish way, it would mean treating my friends in a way that would make me seem distant. I just cant follow this beautiful path set before me if I spent 60% of my emotions and headspace keeping up with this social group.